I know what you’re thinking… you’re thinking that every guy is the same. I want you to know the truth as much as you don’t believe it and maybe you don’t want to hear it right now… the truth is that not every man is the same.
Some guys are more mature than others. Some are more decisive than others. Some are more faithful and committed than others. Some are able to keep their promises when others can’t.
There is hope even when it seems hopeless.
I get it. I get your pain. I get your unbelief. I know what it’s like! I know what it feels like to feel worthless because someone I was in love with didn’t chose me. I know what it feels to be cheated on and lied to. I know what it’s like to have sex outside of marriage and have him dump me like a piece of trash. I know what it’s like to do anything to be loved because I was afraid of missing out. I know what it’s like to cry yourself asleep and starve yourself because you are so depressed after a break up. I know what it’s like to put a loaded gun to my head and wish I was dead because I was sick of being heartbroken. I know what it’s like to chase the wrong men who are not ready for a serious relationship. I know what it’s like to be proposed to without the bended knee and a box with a ring.
I’ve been there. I know. I won’t push aside your pain because it’s real… your feelings and emotions are real. Your situation is real. Singleness isn’t easy but neither is dating or marriage (reality check, friends). This is why we need to stop idolizing the idea of dating and marriage because sometimes love (aka. dating) sucks for the reason that we are all broken people who expect a perfect boyfriend or girlfriend (thanks to romantic comedy movies).
Don’t write up every guy because one or several boys didn’t know how to be a man for a woman like you.
Not every man is the same.
It would be wrong for us to write up every man. However, we should not justify their actions and words either. Some men need time to grow up (whether that is to be the man for you or someone else down the road). Maybe some girls are luckier than most while others are meeting toad after toad. Sometimes, you need to meet those toads so you can appreciate the man that God has for you when he steps into your life unannounced.
Don’t let your pain lead you to having a pessimistic attitude towards every guy.
Why not pray for them and let go of the idea of a relationship to focus on yourself (spiritually, mentally, emotionally, and physically) while waiting to meet a man who will open your eyes to the concept that not every man is the same.
Take this time to grow as a woman who is seeking after God and know that you are valuable enough to be pursued by a man when the time is right (not your timing, but God’s). Focus on graduating high school, college, maybe even grad school! Focus on your career, talents, or developing a new hobby. Focus on your friends and family. Maybe volunteer at a shelter, go on a mission’s trip, or get involved in your local church. Focus on you right now. There is nothing wrong with that no matter how old you are.
Regardless, it will be okay… I want you to know this. But please, do not write up every man because not all of them are the same.